Trump Charity Accused of Stealing Donations Meant for Kids With Windmill Cancer

NEW YORK, NEW YORK — The Trump Pediatric Windmill Cancer Foundation has been formally accused by the State of New York of misappropriating funds that were supposed to go to research into and medical care for children afflicted with windmill turbine cancer.

This is the second time a Trump-connected pediatric cancer charity has been accused of financial misdeeds. In 2017, Forbes published a brutal expose on the Eric Trump Foundation and found that it helped facilitate payments to his father’s charitable organization. The problem is that those funds were supposed to go toward pediatric cancer research and treatment instead of into his father’s coffers.

…while donors to the Eric Trump Foundation were told their money was going to help sick kids, more than $500,000 was re-donated to other charities, many of which were connected to Trump family members or interests, including at least four groups that subsequently paid to hold golf tournaments at Trump courses. (Forbes)

Last year, a New York State judge signed off on the total disbanding of the Trump Foundation, citing a “shocking pattern of illegality.” However, that order said nothing about the foundation the Trump family setup last year to for pediatric windmill cancer. Americans of course understand that President Trump and his sons and daughters are the leading force behind windmill cancer awareness. There are no current studies that indicate how many people are diagnosed with windmill cancer, but President Trump told reporters on the golf course this weekend he’s seen “bigly estimates.”

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“Some people say more people die of windmill cancer every year than the 12.5 billion Angry Democrats on Bob Mueller’s totally exonerating witch hunt,” Trump said. “Other people have said that there are more people getting windmill cancer than the two-and-a-half trillion Mexicans living illegally here. I don’t know about that, but I know what I believe in my heart and that’s just as good as any facts might be.”

Mr. Trump told reporters it’s “very illegal to accuse the president of doing illegal things.” He also suggested that presidents cannot be prosecuted for stealing any money from anyone.

“The way I see it, since I’m President of the United States, and every single piece of money says ‘The United States of America’ on it,” Trump explained. “I technically own all the money in America anyway. And I’m told by unscrupulous lawyers I hired that the way I see it is the way everyone sees it, which is both very legal and very cool.”

Rev. Jerry Falwell Jr. told viewers of his televangelist podcast this weekend that he doesn’t think God “would mind the president skimming” from the charities he runs at all.

“The Bible says only to pay Cesar what is due Cesar, and God what is due God. Considering President Trump thinks of himself as God,” Falwell told his flock, “I don’t see an issue there. Besides, has anyone asked how many of those windmill cancer kids have Democrats for parents? Exactly. Checkmate.”

Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook and Instagram, but not Twitter because he has a potty mouth.

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Written by James Schlarmann

James is the founding contributor and editor-in-chief of The Political Garbage Chute, a political satire and commentary site, which can be found on Facebook as well.

You definitely should not give that much a shit about his opinions.