Dan Broadbent 
NEW YORK, NY – NBC has fired Megyn Kelly after she made controversial remarks regarding the appropriateness of “blackface” – the process of white people painting their faces to appear black.
The practice is widely viewed by just about every decent person as being insensitive towards people of color at the least, and at worst being blatantly racist. However, debate continues nearly nowhere regarding the appropriateness of disparaging people of color in a mocking manner.
Despite being fired for being completely unlikable and not deserving of a platform on any major news network that doesn’t begin with “F” and end in “X”, NBC will be paying out the estimated $69 million remaining on Kelly’s contract.
A true hero’s reward for being so brave!
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NBC is already looking for a replacement for Megyn Kelly however, and it appears that their cup runneth over.
NBC has reportedly been inundated by white, blonde applicants who also promise to appeal to absolutely nobody and offend everyone for no real reason at all.
Debate continues over who the next Piers Morgan will be, however rumors are Jared Kushner is interested after the Trump administration crumbles to pieces.